I give all credit, all thanks to God for continually providing me with peace and just getting me through each minute by minute. I cannot take recognition for that.
Monday morning I got up bright and early, after just going to bed at 1:30am. I stayed up late to deep clean so we would have a nice, clean home to come home to! I wasn't worried about lackof sleep because I was about to be put to sleep. ;) Perry made breakfast for the kids, we prayed for the events about to take place, and together took Zeke to school, then dropped Asher and Macie off with my friend, Crystal.
It was a very rainy day, full of traffic. But we literally made it to the hospital right on time(9am)!Chantell was already there waiting. We went up to the 2nd floor, signed in, were taken back to a room where I had to change, put on stockings to prevent blood clots, and received my IV. I met my pre-op nurse and later my nurse who would be in surgery with me. I also met the anesthesiologist and saw my surgeon again. The pre-op nurse gave me some sort of medicine through my IV to calm nerves, but I did not feel a huge difference; a little light headed/dizzy, but not something drastic like I was expecting.
Chantell and Perry stayed with me the entire time, which was a blessing. To have them there, talking with me about whatever, helped me to keep my thoughts off the surgery about to take place. April, Susan, and Julie - all from small group - also came and sat with me before surgery! How incredible that these ladies decided to come out in the pouring raining and sit through traffic, all for me! Just to give me a hug and say encouraging words before surgery! I love these ladies! My mentor, Anne, also came but got there after I was taken back and had to leave before I was put in my room, but she stayed til I made it out of surgery! I know she came a long ways, too, so it really means the world to me, especially since we didn't get to see each other...but she still came. Melts my heart the love these women have shown me!
I know I read James 2 before surgery. Which you might be like, "Really, Emma?" 'cause it's not Scripture on peace or something directly applying to the situation, but like I said before, I love me some James 2 and it has spoken to me a lot, so I read it allowed and Chantell and Susan prayed (I think it was just them).
I thought there was a pic of me and Perry but neither of us can find it on our phones.
When I was taken back to surgery - which was rather on time from my memory, not like the movies at all - I was anxious to see what the room looked like. When Asher had tubes put in/adenoids out, I remember the room being super big, and white, SO WHITE, kind of scary. But the room I was in, wasn't like that at all. It was smaller than the room Asher had his surgery in, and it was an off-white color. As silly as it sounds, I found it comforting. :) They raised my bed and I scooted over to the operating table. I remember them tying down my arms or something, telling me I would be put to sleep once the anesthesiologist got in there. Moments went by and I just saw a bunch of people walking around doing a much of different things, then in the corner of my left eye I saw the anesthesiologist come in and stand beside my left arm. I remember thinking, "Ok, I'll be going to sleep soon." I was patiently waiting for the popular count down from 100, but that never happened. Without saying a word, he stuck something in my IV and I felt my eye lids become heavy, but I did not feel sleepy. Next thing I know I woke up in recovery! Seriously, just as smoothly and as quickly as that.
Recovery was a big open room with a bunch of beds and curtians between each bed. I remember seeing a man across the room but he was all alone, no nurses, nothing. He was not there the entire time I was. When I woke up, I remember feeling just a lot of stuff going on around my neck. It was the stitches, draining tube, and foam looking padding stuff they kept around my neck. I had several nurses around me, and as I started to come to, I remember pain. Just lots and lots of pain. And I just expected that I wouldn't wake in pain, that they would have given pain medicine in advance or something. But I started crying. And then screaming. I was in so. much. pain! Then I guess I passed out again. I guess I fell asleep and woke up many times that first day. The next time I remember waking up, I looked at the clock and saw it was 3:30-3:45. I knew surgery was 2 hours, so I should've been out at 1, and originally I was told recovery would only be about 45 minutes long. I started asking why I was still in recovery, when I could see my husband... She said they couldn't control my pain and how I woke up kicking and screaming saying it was a 9-10 on the scale. Ohh, sorry about that. :-/ Total I was in recovery about or just under 2 hours before taken back to my room where I would be staying over night.
Perry, April, Susan, Julie, and Chantell all came to see me after surgery. I just remember being in and out of it a lot. People would be talking to me and I would be fine, then suddenly my eyes would get heavy, next thing I knew I'd wake up to everyone chit chatting. lol. I felt so bad for falling asleep on them! Susan brought me flowers from the group. Eventually, small group left. I remember my friend, Sheree, stopped by after work. She had to leave to pick up her girls from day care but then came back later and stayed until around 11pm! I appreciate all the visits :) I love being surrounded by the ones I love!
On the left, flowers given to me by small group the evening after surgery.
Flowers on the right are from April, the morning after surgery.
Perry's mom and stepdad came by at one point to bring Perry Taco Bell for dinner. They didn't stay but for a minute. I didn't eat at all that day. No appetite.
So, I loved my 7p-7a shift nurses. Really. Later that evening, one of my nurses came in asking if I wanted to go walking and I said yes. She, Perry, and I walked a lap while I pushed my IV. I felt great! Woo-hoo! I felt so great in fact that I walked three more laps. Feeling like a champ because apparently most don't walk laps the first night, or at least not four laps, I came back into the room feeling a bit queezy as I sat on the bed. I bet you can guess what happened next...Oh yes I did. And I cried for my husband like a little baby, true story. The nurse then says in a matter of fact way that how anesthesia will have that affect. WELL, if ya were to have told me that to begin with, I would have stopped after lap one! Really, it's all good though. She was a sweetie and I ended up walking more later on and got to know her better. :)
I didn't sleep so great that night. Pretty much in 30 minute increments. So I watched a lotta TV and surfed a lotta Facebook. 3am they came to take blood. That's just cruel.
Oh, and this was pretty funny. They kept oxygen on me. Well, sometime super late at night, or early in the morning, they took it off me, and as I was falling asleep all the bells and wistles went off saying my oxygen went down to 86. So, the nurse came in and put me back on oxygen. I still had my stockings on, preventing blood clots, I'm cautious like that. Yes, you could not tell this was a 24 year old chica, I resembled more of a great granny.
So that morning when the doctor came in, he made a comment about me still being on oxygen! He even said, "You're too young to still be on this!" and took me off it. I felt kind of silly. But I did keep the stockings on for a bit more! ;-) He said my para-thyroid and calcium levels came back normal. PHEW! He said my thyroid was super enlarged and had a lot of scarring. He said to go to his office on Thursday to have draining tube removed, then in 1-2 weeks the pathology report would be in and I'll make an appt to come in for that.
Chantell and Susan visited briefly that morning where Susan shared a devotion thingie called Daily Bread (I think) and I shared mine from Jesus Calling. It was nice. :) April stopped by too and was actually there when I was released at about 12:30-1pm. My friend, Farah, brought us dinner that evening.
I had a hard time sleeping and being comfortable in general with that draining tube. I seriously feel for everyone who has ever HAD to have surgery and I seriously do not know why anyone would CHOOSE to have surgery done (cosmetic). It is not a fun time.
Wednesday April came and helped out and Chantell brought food. We actually had a miscommunication with food and Crystal and Mikaela (works with Perry at church) also brought food. Thank goodness for frigs/freezers! My mother in law came over that evening and stayed til about 8:30pm. Thursday sweet Susan came and stayed until the evening and Jonathan (Zeke's Cub Scout leader) brought us macaroni. Susan was incredibly patient and interactive with my kids. I feel like I learned so much as a parent from her! She made us all dinner. She took great care of me and my kids, I was totally impressed! Crystal took me to my appointment that afternoon and held my hand as the draining tube was snipped and removed. Again, not a fun time. I literally have a hole in my chest area covered by a bandaid. I have an appointment for January 29th to go back to go over the pathology reports. I was informed he also took lympth nodes to check them for cancer as well.
Friday was my first day alone and I completely over did myself by cleaning, doing school work with Asher, taking the babes outside. I was in a lot of pain and exhausted. Too much too soon, for sure. April came over just before 5 and drove us and all our kids to Amber's house for ice cream and cake for baby Bryson's first b-day.
Saturday I was alone again, feeling more sick with my heart racing and kind of had a mental break down. My sweet friend, Kati, listened attentively as a moaned and complained. She was so kind and selfless by offering to drive from an hour away and to come take my kids for a couple days to help out when she herself has 4 kids. Ultimately, Zeke did not want to go because he wanted to see his daddy on Sunday, but the fact she would do that for me...wow! She is a great friend! I love her! God really took care of me that day, I was at my wits end. Out of nowhere Amber texted saying she was bringing dinner and Crystal came over and helped clean that night. So thankful for God's love through Kati, Amber, and Crystal.
This morning Perry and the kiddos went to church while I stayed home. I've pretty much had an insanely lazy day. I am just so ready to be healed and over this and move on with my life. I have so many big plans for this year, both personally and as a family. I feel like this is holding me back. But I am *trying* oh-so-hard to be patient. I know He has His reasons, and so I wait...
A picture made for me by Amber, with one of my favorite verses.
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