Thursday, August 27, 2015

First Day of School

 Reading "His Mighty Warrior" before school.




 Walking to Asher's school. I thought we would walk him to class, but once we got to the front of the school, he said he wanted to walk himself to class because he wants to be a big boy. >heart melt <
This is a big year for my boys! Zeke has started middle school, leaving Asher in elementary by himself for the first time. They were both so brave! We have prayed so much about this day and I believe we had others praying for us too. They both had a good day and are excited to be back in school! Zeke walked home from school with a friend (he does not know I followed some of the way, ssshhhhhh ). So proud of my guys and the young men they're becoming!

"Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith, and in puritg." 1 Timothy 4:12

Saturday, August 15, 2015

2 Timothy 1:7

2 Timothy 1:7 says:

"For God did not give us a spirit of fear, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline."

God did not give us a spirit of fear... I always thought of that as, like, a trait. God did not give us the personality trait of fear. But today I realize God gave us a spirit...The Holy Spirit. And the Holy Spirit is not a spirit of fear. Does that make sense? This just hit me.

Monday, August 10, 2015

5k


Saturday August 8th, 2015

The kids and I participated in our first 5k! And what I love so much about this one is the cause; preventing child abuse! So near and dear to my heart, I'm so thankful we were able to be part of this event! I got to have some good conversations with the kids about this and prayers. So thankful for this experience! Looking forward to more in the future!

Sunday, August 9, 2015

6th grade orientation




It is so crazy to think in just a couple weeks, I will have a middle schooler!! Yikes!! Where has the time gone?! Just yesterday he was my 7lb 12oz baby!!

Last Wednesday was orientation at his new school for 6th graders. The principal spoke, the kiddos got their schedules and were able to walk around and find their lockers. Open house is later this month and that's when they'll meet their teachers.

Zeke enjoyed walking around and seeing where all his classes will be. We found his locker and it took a minute to figure out how to work it - the janitor ended up helping us ;) - he is so excited about having a locker! And these ones are full size. When I was in middle school, they were half size. The janitor told us every year kids get locked inside them. Not very comforting to this mama!!

All in all, it was a great time. It got Zeke really pumped up and excited for the year to come. This is really happening, folks, I can't believe it!!

Tuesday, August 4, 2015

Fight Song

My Song Right Now

https://youtu.be/xo1VInw-SKc

Like a small boat
On the ocean
Sending big waves
Into motion
Like how a single word
Can make a heart open
I might only have one match
But I can make an explosion

And all those things I didn't say
Wrecking balls inside my brain
I will scream them loud tonight
Can you hear my voice this time?

This is my fight song
Take back my life song
Prove I'm alright song
My power's turned on
Starting right now I'll be strong
I'll play my fight song
And I don't really care if nobody else believes
'Cause I've still got a lot of fight left in me

Losing friends and I'm chasing sleep
Everybody's worried about me
In too deep
Say I'm in too deep
And it's been two years
I miss my home
But there's a fire burning in my bones
Still believe
Yeah, I still believe

And all those things I didn't say
Wrecking balls inside my brain
I will scream them loud tonight
Can you hear my voice this time?

This is my fight song
Take back my life song
Prove I'm alright song
My power's turned on
Starting right now I'll be strong
I'll play my fight song
And I don't really care if nobody else believes
'Cause I've still got a lot of fight left in me

A lot of fight left in me

Like a small boat
On the ocean
Sending big waves
Into motion
Can make a heart open
I might only have one match
But I can make an explosion

This is my fight song (Hey!)
Take back my life song (Hey!)
Prove I'm alright song (Hey!)
My power's turned on
Starting right now I'll be strong (I'll be strong)
I'll play my fight song
And I don't really care if nobody else believes
'Cause I've still got a lot of fight left in me

No I've still got a lot of fight left in me

Saturday, August 1, 2015

Saturday Night Ramblings

I want to talk about it so bad, I do, but I don't know where to start. Perhaps now isn't the right time? Perhaps I'm not suppose to talk about it at all? I would need to be careful with my words as I'm not looking to destroy anyone's reputation, nor do I wish to hurt the ones who matter the most; the kids.

Releasing words is therapeutic for me, but this situation is a delicate one.

The pain is increasing, my mind erupting with words, feelings that I want to share, that I want to get off my chest. Someone listen! I want to be heard, to be understood.

Perhaps the take away in all this is to release these thoughts/feelings/words to Him?!!! But I want to share, I want others to understand, and I want to warn others; beware.

I've been practicing deep breathes lately. Stop whatever, eyes shut, slow deep breath in, hold, slowly release deep breath, repeat x5.

My anxiety has gotten the best of me lately, so deep breathing helps me to stop, pause, seek, regroup, try again.

Part of me is excited for the fall...full time work and full time school for me, full time school plus possible extra curricular activities for kids. Busy, busy, busy is better than having too much time on your hands where you dwell in the pain and "what ifs". Yet all the responsibility that comes with that busy schedule scares me...what if I can't do it? What if I fail? It's not about failing myself but the three little ones who rely on me to keep it together. So I've come to realize already just how dependant I'll be on Him during this season (and all those thereafter). I can't do this in my own strength.

So much rambling tonight...just so much on my mind...my heart is heavy...sitting on a break through, I believe...something big is about to happen.