If I could talk to the young me

If I could go back in time and talk to my old self, my young self ...

I would tell her to be intentional. With her words, actions, clothing. To be mindful of long term consequences. We can be forgiven of all sins, but that does not mean we are free of the consequences. Sometimes those consequences follow us into adulthood and are thrown in our face and spoken behind our back even though you've been set free. This is the consequence of the choices you made. And we know life isn't fair, so anyone at any time may bring it up...they may not look at you with such love and grace as your Heavenly Father does- they may be more critical and lack mercy. They may not see you for who you've become, but who you were. They may not understand your why's for doing what you did, they may not care about your history and lack of love and self worth growing up that lead to those sins. They just see you as a sinner, a criminal, a whore (or whatever your sin may have been) and that is how they keep you marked in their book. Thankfully- we know that thru salvation in Jesus Christ we are forgiven of our sins. But again, our sins bear consequences, and life/people aren't fair.

So I ask young (or any age) people, what you do/say/wear, where is this leading? Are you desensitizing yourself from reality? Are you looking for love in all the wrong places? Are you so scared that you are making a choice out of fear - not even considering the long term affects? Will your choices today negatively affect your future in someway? Are these choices something you would be proud to tell a future spouse, child, employer?

Sometimes living the intentional life with the bigger picture in mind is hard ... But I think the alternative, the past sins coming back to haunt you, people not giving you a fair chance but judging you based on those sins as a youth - I think all that is so much worse.

Dear young Emma,
I wish you knew at 17 that your Savior loves you - even if the men in your life walked away, hurt you, and didn't love you, He did/does and HE IS ENOUGH. I wish you knew that no problem you may face in life is bigger or too big for God...that if you humbly come before Him, He will lead you down the right the path and sustain you. I wish you didn't care so much about what others think about you...because when the going got tough, they all left, and only He was there, arms wide open. He is all you need and then some. Oh Emma, how I wish you didn't compromise your beliefs/morals to appease those around you. I wish you knew what He says about you, I wish you were confident in His truth.

But alas, there is no time machine, there is no going back. So what can I do? I can share my story, specifically with my children, I can pray for them/with them, point them towards Christ and may they choose to live with intention.