It is hard not to be a man hater right now...to not be a cynic right now.

Once I start allowing myself to feel comfortable around him, once I start to like him, he stops liking me, he is done with me. And "he" always handles the situation poorly. Be a man, say what you're thinking instead of avoiding it; instead of acting like you never knew me.

My heart is left broken and I am angered.

And I realize my emotional and spiritual health affects my physical and so this is something I need to get a hold of. I don't trust anyone! I don't believe anyone! And the second I start to let my wall down, they're done with me. I feel the tears coming now as I replay conversations we had. But hey! Whatever, he's good to move on. Good for him.

Lord help me.